laptopped:

do rude people know they’re rude

(via hotboyproblems)

sextradite:

ridge:

IM REALLY TIRED OF PARENTS THINKING THAT EVERYONE ON THE INTERNET IS A PREDATOR 

ikr wanna meet up and talk about it so where do you live?

(via pizza)

thindie:

um how do i get skinny by tomorrow

(via relahvant)

  • parents: "schools easy"
  • me: "can you help me on this homework problem"
  • parents: "idk that shit its hard lmao"

hitoml:

judge in court: everything u say will be held against u
me: boobs
jury: haha
lawyer: haha
judge: haha case dismissed

(via theturtlexpress)

bonny-notion:

found this in a doctors office

im not convinced they know what drugs do

(via gaytable)

lecterings:

'where is the pen i was using like 3 seconds ago' an autobiography i'll never write because i keep losing the pen i was using like 3 seconds ago.

(via yer-a-blizzard-harreh)

istoleyourpanties:

quarterclever:

especiallygoodfinder:

nepeter:

australians dont have sex

australians mate

I spat out my coffee

sorry about your image

frICK

(Source: shalrath, via b00tyenthusiast)

svvords:

*washes hands with my tears*

(Source: wasiangod, via relahvant)

"you should act more your age"

image

(Source: fancyladsnack, via overlyattachedbanana)

confidnet:

supersamurai91:

confidnet:

i wasted my last bagel my life is over

Just get some bread and cut out a circle

i have never been so offended in my entire life

(Source: malumsau, via shiterrific)

rainsfell:

how do i get over someone who i never dated

(via crystallized-teardrops)

gayleaf:

you’re not allowed to wear a cotton t-shirt unless you’re a true fan! do you go to the fields and look at it? do you appreciate the agricultural implications of a gigantic cotton industry? do you understand the harvesting process? name 5 cotton harvesting machines. didn’t think so

(via baracknobama)

absolvtely:

stop unfollowing me I’m pregnant with your child

(Source: gypsums, via hotboyproblems)